The New Professors
by thebookgirl20
Summary: There are some new teachers in Hogwarts. Will everyone like them? Will they turn out to be good? And what will umbridge say! We all know her opinion counts!
1. Controversy Cauldron

"What makes you so sure that you are right for this position?" The elderly woman sitting at the ornate desk in the middle of the room spoke.

"I've done some work with ingredients and recipes before, I know how this works. It's my thing," the Irish accent in the man rung through his words, as he spoke from his rather insignificant position in the room.

"I'm sure we've all done a little mixing before," the woman paused to let her peers laugh around her from the hearing seats, "but can you teach mixology?"

"Hear me out. If there's one thing I can do right, it's Potions."

"Alright then,"

A hammer was knocked.

The meeting was adjourned.

People filed out the room, to talk to the press.

"Just yesterday, the start of the increasingly controversial and scruntinised projects begun in the Ministry of Magic Hearing Court No. 2," Mr Weasley read out, from the Daily Prophet. The family were sitting in the living room, with hot mugs and sweet pastries, chatting, listening to the radio and the occasional news article.

"I think it's terrible how they're doing it," Fred said.

"Letting Death Eaters teach at our school," George agreed.

"I think it's a bit unfair to call them death eaters anymore now. They've been through intensive therapy and treatment at St Mungos, to help them with their problems. Voldemort's gone now." Molly said pityingly.

"You'll be one of the only ones Molly," Arthur commented, "loads of folk at work have been furious about it,"

"Go on, read us the rest of the article," Urged Ron, looking up from his game of Gobstones.

Arthur picked up the paper again.

"When is this going to end?" Professor Sprout looked worryingly at Minerva McGonagall. Her old friend had come for a visit and now they were sat in Sprout's garden, eating fresh fruit and discussing the latest controversies."Well, Pomona, it could be worse. They are only going to be assistant professors,"

"But Minerva I would have thought you of all people would be totally against it."

"I'm not completely happy with it, I'll tell you, but I do believe in second chances. I know the power of change and its effect in people. I'd like to welcome them to Hogwarts to help them, just like we do with anyone else who comes,"

"I see your point," Pomana put her cup down,"But I'm always going to approach them hesitantly,"

"I understand," Minerva respected he feelings.

Back in the Weasley Residence, Ron was writing a letter to Harry. He'd managed to find clippings of the article they were reading earlier and knew Harry wouldn't know about it. He'd already talked to Hermione on the matter, who had a subscription to the Daily Prophet.

 _Dear Harry,_

 _Here's some news you might find interesting. Dad was telling us the other night, I can't believe it myself. Hope you're having a good time. Weather's nice for the first time in forever. Send me an owl pronto._

 _Ron_

Harry skimmed through Ron's letter, picking up the clipping that'd fallen out the parcel. It was an article about death eaters teaching at the school, and nothing less. Shocking news. Hogwarts was welcoming death eaters as part of a ministry of magic scheme. Harry thought Fudge wouldn't even have been stupid enough to do this.

He quickly picked up his quill and started writing away. "What the hell is wrong with the Ministry of Magic these days? And Dumbledore can't possibly allow this?"

He did think that there must be some sort of goodness to it otherwise Dumbledore would've never allowed it to happen.

A printing press far away was working on producing as many papers as possible surrounding interviews with Death Eaters. Time would tell when the new school year arrived.


	2. Welcome To Hogwarts

The Hogwarts Express ground to a puffing halt as the clocks turned to six. The children were chattering excitedly, more than usual due to the trepidation of death eaters teaching.

"It would be embarrassing if they sat with the students, Ron, they're not going to," Hermione argued as she sat in the carriage to Hogwarts.

"C'mon, Dumbledore hates death eaters. He's not sitting in the same table as them,"

"Especially as they're a ministry of magic conspiracy hatched to make the children believe in government ideas," Luna added casually.

They all looked at her, skeptically.

"I don't think they'll sit with the students," Harry commented.

"And if they do, it'll be with the Slytherins,"

"Well I don't think they will, because they'll want an even spread of coverage. Better infiltration skills," Luna pointed out.

"I'm sure they have excellent infiltration skills Luna," Neville nodded.

The children agreed that whatever was happening was certainly annoying the hell out of the teachers. Hagrid has seemed tense when they talked to him and even given them a proper telling off for asking about the death eaters.

"I know that the elephant in the room for you students, is the arrival of our newly established teaching assistants. Some classes this year will have assistant teachers who are here to share their knowledge, gain experience of the teaching world and to have a better understanding of it. I'm sure you all will treat them with the respect and kindness any teacher in the school demands. On saying that, Mr Filch has reminded pupils that a list of banned Zonko's products is available for inspection in the Entrance Hall, should anyone wish to view it." Dumbledore finished his speech, returning to his chair with a fond smile.

"They should more worried about Fred and George," Ron grabbed a chicken as the food had appeared.

"How are they getting on?" Harry asked excitedly. Harry loved seeing the new inventions, however much craziness had been put in them.

"How ever they are, it's not right," Hermione reprimanded, "Although some of the spells they use are amazing. I must get them to teach me one day. They're good with spells,"

"Girls, one minute they're exploding, the next they're sleeping, I'll never understand," Ron.

"The thing I don't understand is where the death eaters actually are," Hermione stabbed at her chip with frustration, "Dumbledore welcomed them nicely, why hasn't he shown them?"

Nearly Headless Nick floated past them, "They are yet to arrive. Dumbledore decided it would be easier to let them arrive at night, so that the press wouldn't be swarming them,"

"What are they, celebrities?" Ron sarcastically muttered.

"It seems like it," Harry replied. His parents were dead set against the death eaters as they knew Voldemort, their former leader had been a horrific vile human being. Fortunately, after his demise, details unknown, and his funeral, the death eaters were given intensive therapy by Mungo's best and trained wizards removed parts of their memory, the parts that persuaded them about Voldemort, and helped them overcome that period of time in their lives. The Death Eaters were now aware of their past but not tempted to fall down the path again. Harry's parents still didn't like them, and he knew Ron's and Neville's were the same.

That night, as the castle slept, the new teachers arrived, greeted by Dumbledore and his bright purple dressing gown.


	3. Politeness in Potions?

"Who in their right mind gave us double Potions on a Monday Morning?" Ron grumbled, walking into the class.

"Not me, Weasley, I'm just as angry as you are, about spending time together in the morning," Snape scowled. He looked like he'd missed his coffee.

"Fortunately though," Snape said, "We have a teaching assistant with us. His name is Professor Dolohov. This means we will have an extra hand in clearing Longbottom's mess when it inevitably happens,"

Hermione glared at Snape viciously.

Dolohov nodded at the students, feeling sorry for the one named Longbottom.

"The first potion we will be brewing, is the Wideye Potion. It keeps people from falling asleep. I think we need a dose of Wideye potion in this class," Snape continued, "I will be marking essays, and Professor Dolohov will be wandering around trying o help you. Some of you unfortunately are helpless, as he will find out," With that, Snape sat down and everyone set to work.

"I'll collect the ingredients, you get the equipment ready," Harry said to Ron. They worked as a good team, so hopefully the Death Eater wouldn't come over. They did have Neville on their side though, which eventually caused him reason to come. Dolohov walked over after seeing Neville attempt to chop the roots, and fail.

"Hey kid, what's your name?"

"N-n-Neville Longbottom," he nervously answered.

"Well, Neville, do you want me to teach you a way to chop the roots easily? Because forgive me for saying, but it's quite frustrating watching you,"

"Sorry!" Neville said, very nervous now.

Dolohov took the knife and set to work at the roots, showing Neville the technique. "No need to be sorry, or nervous. I'm here to help you learn," Dolohov nodded and wandered off to another table.

"He's pretty good isn't he?" Neville said, looking at his perfect roots while Harry and Ron stared.

"He's a death eater," Ron whispered, "he'd probably had practise with poisonous potions,"

Neville frowned, "But he did _help_ me and Snape never does,"

That lesson continued on, with potions simmering and being stirred occasionally, and with Dolohov wandering around assisting people. At the end of the lesson, Snape called them all around a particular potion. "Who wants to try a sip of Neville's Wideye potion? Anyone?" He smiled sneeringly around the class.

Neville looked frightened at the class who wouldn't move. Ron stepped forward, "I'm half asleep, it won't do me any harm,"

He was administered the potion and a for a seconds stood still. Then he let out a huge yawn and pumped into action. He looked very visibly awake.

"Don't worry Mr Weasley, the effects of the potion will wear off once you are naturally awake, so you won't notice a difference. However, Mr Longbottom, you were lucky that Professor Dolohov was here otherwise your potion, well, I don't think anyone wouldn't dared to try it," He laughed, at the last sentence, mockingly.

"Don't worry Professor Snape. The only thing I had to help Longbottom on was the root cutting. He did everything else himself. He's a very clever student," Dolohov spoke up, standing up to Snape's taunts.

He could never bear teachers who so visibly mocked the students using their power. Or people like that in general. Voldemort had been like that. Dolohov felt a knot in his stomach, which was released as the bell rung out.

Hermione met Harry and Ron in the Great Hall, as they hurried to a space in Gryffindor Table. "How was the new potions assistant, then?" She asked.

"Welll," Ron paused, "I found him a bit creepy and whatever but Neville seems to have taken a liking to him,"

"Neville?" Hermione intrigued.

"He was helping him, and at the end of the lesson, he even stood up for him in front of Snape," Harry supplied.

"That's very brave of him," Hermione noted.

"Well, you know, he was a death eater," Ron added.

"Ron!" Harry and Hermione both chided loudly.

"Bloody hell, what've I done?"


	4. Herbs and Spices

"Today in Herbology, we will be alongside an assistant Herbology teacher. Her name is Professor Lestrange, and I want everyone to understand they can approach her for advice this lesson as well as me,"

Professor Lestrange stood leaning against the wall in the glass house, eyeing the pupils. She was dressed, not in her usual gothic style, but in a long brown robe fastened by leaf brooches. The Golden Trio caught her eye as they pulled on their dragon leather gloves.

"She looks less scary than she is in the papers," Ron whispered.

"Why are you whispering?" Hermione said normally.

"Are you scared of Bellatrix?" Harry teased.

" _Professor Lestrange_ to you!" A sharp voice behind the trio spoke. They turned to face Bellatrix, who snarled unimpressed. "What have you done so far?" She questioned.

"We got our Wiggentrees," Ron mumbled.

"Everyone's got the wiggentrees. Get the pot, shovel, soil and start planting them now!" She sauntered off.

"I don't like her so much," Harry groaned, collecting tools.

"I think she's very efficient." Hermione smile admiringly.

For the rest of the lesson, Professor Lestrange swaggered around giving students snarky advice. Hermione thought she was badass, and Ron thought she was bad and an arse.

"No wonder Neville's parents didn't like her!" Ron argued that night in the common room, quietly.

"Neville's parents got kidnapped and nearly tortured by her, that's why they didn't like her," Harry reasoned.

"Honestly Ron, she's a decent teacher, why do you have to be an arse to people sometimes?"

"Just saying," Ron held up his arms.

Fred and George came on either side of Ron and gave him a high five. "Are you excited for Care Of Magical Creatures tomorrow?" They asked.

"Not really, no," Harry looked puzzled.

"Don't you want to find out who Hagrid's got?" Fred said in amazement.

"We want to know!" George added.

"And it would only make sense for you to tell us tomorrow!" They both chimed

DAILY PROPHET

 _HOGWARTS NEW TEACHING ASSISTANTS HAVE PROVED POPULAR! BUT WILL THEY MANAGE TO PASS ASSESMENT?_

Ministry Big Wig Dolores Umbridge has been assigned to inspect the new teaching staff at Hogwarts School. She admits that she doesn't like the new idea and feels they should be sentenced to death instead of recuperate into normal society. "I'm going to inspect them," She is reported to have said, "and I'm going to inspect them harshly." The teaching staff, who have been praised by students and parents alike have shocked the wizarding community as to how well criminals can behave. "A dementors kiss is the right solution" however, according to Umbridge. 

"Seriously? What's up with Umbridge," Ron leaned over to read the article.

"I thought you didn't like the teachers Ron," Seamus yawned, pouring milk into his cereal.

"Well no, but a dementors kiss is a bit harsh,"

"Who wrote that anyway? Rita Skeeter?" Lavender interjected.

"Probably not, it sounds positive," Hermione said.

The morning they had Care of Magical Creatures. However many times the golden trio had asked, Hagrid wouldn't let on who was helping him. He sounded neither pleased nor disappointed. He only said gruffly that they'd find out sooner or later.

They found out this morning as the group stumbled along the woodenly floors of the forest, with the sun beaming down. Beside Hagrid in his usual thick get up, was a slimline tall blond, with the hair pulled back in a ponytail. It was Lucius Malfoy.


	5. Fantastic Bugs and Stuff

Care of Magical Creatures had never seen a more fun lesson, than that Tuesdays. The kids had worked with Blast Ended Stewts, trying to keep them from exploding, while Malfoy helped. He may not be evil but he was snooty, and despaired as he got dirtier and dirtier. He moaned and complained more than anyone had ever done, and at the end probably learned the most. Most of the children were laughing at him, having learned about Blast Ended Stewts before.

"Seriously, Malfoy?" Hagrid spoke to him at the end of the lesson.

"I'm trying my hardest. I'm not used to crap like this!"

"Well, get used to it then, cause yer doin that for the rest of yer time 'ere,"

Malfoy huffed. Unlike the other death eaters, he had been given a subject, as he didn't specify one. Damn school had to go and put him with this overgrown bush. It was annoying to say the least, but he'd talk with Dumbledore as soon as.

The Dinner Table at Hogwarts for the assistant teachers was located in front of the normal teacher's table at the lower level. They kept an eye on students and were permitted to give and take points as well, to an extent. The normal teachers were enjoying this.

"It's nice to be able to enjoy your food without having to deal with the rowdy kids," Flitwick remarked, one night.

"Ah yes, our assistants are doing a good job," Dumbledore agreed.

Sprout smiled, "it's always good to have an extra hand in Herbology, someone to help sort out plants and such, you know!"

However at the assistant's table, things were going rather difficultly. "I'm going to turn my chair round slightly," Bellatrix announced, "so make space!"

"Why!" Malfoy complained, "I have little space as it is,"

"I need to see the kids, otherwise how will we be able to keep an eye on them?" Bellatrix insisted. At that instant, a fight broke out between a couple of slytherins. "Great, who's going this time?" They all moaned. Crabbe pushed his chair back and went off, to say the usual line that'd make the students behave.

"Stop fighting or McGonagall's hearing about it,"

Of course, for McGonagall's favourite students or generally griffindors, it'd be Snape's name.


	6. The Storm

One night at Hogwarts there was a very heavy storm. Thunder crashed against the walls and lightning lit up castle windows. This on its own would not be a problem any day for Hogwarts students. It was pretty frightening, however, and sensing that, the dementors went a bit wild. They wouldn't stay at their usual entrances, and floated around house dorms. The teachers found out at about nine o'clock when frightened students rushed to them, complaining, and prefects reported odd dementor sightings.

A short staff meeting was held, and it was decided that all the students would sleep in the Great Hall, with teachers on guard, and appropriate charms in place. "The Permenant Hogwarts Staff," Dumbledore announced, "Will be in charge of spells, protection and guard from Dementors. Our assistant professors can assist the children, looking after them but also assuring they behave,"

In an all very exciting move, the house tables were levitated upwards and placed at the side of the hall, while hundreds of midnight blue and purple sleeping bags with golden crescents and stars, filled the room. Separate houses were led to different parts of the hall, and from there, years were separated.

Harry, Ron, Hermione, Neville were all in a space together. "What's happening with the dementors?" Harry shivered, getting cosy in his bag.

"It's the weather, I heard the teachers, they think the dementors are going crazy because of it," Hermione explained, sounding scared.

"I bet it's what they're used to in Azkaban," Neville muttered darkly.

"Cheer up!" Ron smiled, "we've got ex death eaters to defend us,"

One suddenly came over to the little group's spot, "Seriously, all you kids ever do is chat. Keep quiet now at least! People are trying to sleep," she sounded tired.

The ceiling of the great hall had been turned into a calm night sky, with many stars and constellations twinkling brightly, especially by Professor Trelawney.

Once all the kids had presumebly gone to sleep, the assistant professors sat down to have some small snacks, courtesy of the house elves, at the teachers table. They ate with a silencing charm around them, so they could talk without disturbing the children.

"I remember a storm like this, at that horrifying place," Bellatrix recalled.

"It was worse in Azkaban though, everything was,"

"Don't remind me of that horrible place I'll have nightmares,"

"Seriously, did Professor Dumbledore pick out the sleeping bag pattern design,"

"I wouldn't put it past him. It looks like one of his hats."

"You should see my great aunt's hat if you want a ridiculous hat. I still don't know how her portrait can look so proud with it on,"

"Portraits are generally idiotic!"

"Better not say that here,"

They all laughed, enjoying the warm drinks and muffins. House elves were really skilled bakers. Ron(for one), who had said this a million times, could say it a million more if anyone listened.

However, they might have had a silencing charm, but it wouldn't be Ron Weasley to not see the food. And he lived up to his reputation. On spotting the food, he quickly whispered to the others. "Haven't you had enough Ron! You snack all the time!"Hermione complained, turning over.

"You don't understand Hermione! They have muffins!" Ron argued, formulating a plan in his head, to steal a muffin. "Neville," he said gently, "you distract the death eaters, all of them, and I'll pick us up a few muffins. They've got loads,"

"Yeah why would all the death eaters come to Neville?" Harry asked, drowsily. With this particular thought in mind Harry fell asleep.

Suddenly a death eater walked up to the four unsuspecting students. "What are you doing?" He asked in a confused voice.

"Nothing I swear," Harry held his hands open and sat up, looking guilty.

"Not you!" The death eater shouted, "him!" He was pointing to the horrendous sight of Neville who seemed to be beatboxing, breakdancing and wearing his pants on his head.

The other death eaters ran over as Neville continued this crime to dancing. The extremely strange sight caught the attention of many students, with people clambering over each other to see Neville.

"I was only doing it so Ron could get the muffins!" Neville said, panting, after he'd stopped.

As Harry opened his eyes, he saw:

A teachers assistant table with no muffins.

Ron fast asleep.

Neville, also, fast asleep.

He wondered if his dreams used to go to Voldemort when they'd been connected. If so, Voldemort would've been so creeped out he probably wouldn't avoided Hogwarts. And Neville.


	7. The Storm 2

The storm wasn't the talk of the week, because it hadn't overshadowed the real news. The news of Umbridge coming to inspect the assistant teachers.

All of the normal teachers, who had now developed some sort of protective oath around the assistants were angry. McGonagall complained loudly one Tranfiguration lesson, "If you can't get the image of a toad in your head, think of Dolores Umbridge, a person who comes very close," Snape was sure that his assistant would get top marks, however. "Even if he is a big soft, we have nothing to worry about in this class," he told the students, while the assistant was away, "Except your exam results Potter, nothing can help them," Harry was partially confused as they hadn't had an exam since he'd been in Snape's class this year.

Umbridge was due to come on January the Sixteenth, and nobody could wait. They were to have a special assembly, much to her own request.

The assistants were nervous, however, as this was a ministry official they'd faced before and many had been locked away by her. They were promised a fair result and some annoyances, by Dumbledore who promised to ease the latter. But you know, it was Umbridge.

The Sixteenth came and everyone was packed in the hall to hear what Umbridge so desperately wanted to say.

She stood up on the podium, with a little _hem-hem_ towards Dumbledore. Smiling at them all, graciously, she started.

"I visited this school a long time ago, a few years in fact, and I did not like what I saw. Neither do I currently, in fact the ministry do not. However it is our job to see if things are improving at Hogwarts, which is why we have agreed to do formal reviews of certain teaching positions at Hogwarts School. The assistant teachers will be reviewed and checked to see if they are, as they are rumoured, helping the school. I will attend classes, and do what is necessary for the development of the School and the Ministry's interests."

The end of her speech didn't bring any applause, except polite patter from the teachers, with the students just staring at her.

"Wow the centaurs didn't change her a bit," Harry shook his head.

"Did you think they would?" Hermione cynically stated, "Because I really didn't."

"I hope she doesn't get rid of Professor Dolohov," Neville said anxiously. Ron scoffed, waving a carefree hand, "She won't, he's really helpful,"

McGonagall shook her head as the former Hogwarts Inquisitor sat down, presently.

"I bet the ministry's more lively than this lot," Hagrid commented on the kids, lightheartedly.

"The ministry know what's good for them," Umbridge replied coldly, "And what is good for the school. Assistant Professors never made that list, death eaters certainly couldn't."

"Former death eaters Dolores," Dumbledore reminded her.


	8. The Inspections

Umbridge had a lot of difficulty climbing the stairs up to Divination. She knew she wasn't young but she didn't think she was unfit. The regular teacher was ridiculous here, but thank goodness he had taken leave. A half breed in charge of education? He was better off on holiday, that would be permanent if Dolores had arranged it.

The dumb Professor Trelawney was here instead today, she would certainly cause for an amusing day. Not. She knew Trelawney was a fake and a charlatan. It's a shame she was forbidden from judging permanent teachers. Only the filthy death eaters would get her judgement, this time. She was in a right mind to throw Hagrid out.

"Good Afternoon, Professor," Umbridge announces her arrival in front of the tired looking class. The assistant, she spied, was hopelessly sitting on one of the odd looking pouffes.

Trelawney merely ushered to a seat, and began her lesson. The class were supposed to be doing astrological signs. Or Signs from the Skies, as their assistant professor Goyle called it.

"How do you find Professor Goyle?" Asked Umbridge to an unsuspecting girl chewing her nails. "Um, uh, alright?" The girl replied.

Such enthusiasm.

Umbridge prowled the classroom, asking simple students random questions and then interviewing Goyle himself. He wasn't capable of holding conversations but the coursework had been taught. It was like a situation from a muggle school in East Asia where they only cared for studies not social skills. Damn Hogwarts was like a Muggle school now!

"It's quite different from being a move wife, Narcissa, are you finding the change alright?" Umbridge questioned as please try as she could.

Narcissa looked at her and continued on with her work, explaining an astrological chart to some students.

"Did you predict the dark lord's demise with this chart as well?" Umbridge intrigued further, annoying Narcissa. Narcissa stood up and straightened herself, "I don't think you and I understand each other. I am an assistant professor, here to teach professionally, and you are an inspector,"

The next lesson Umbridge visited didn't help her negative view either. It seemed the students were fine with death eaters and actually learned things. That was quite a surprise, honestly, thinking back to DADA.

Peeves threw chalk at her while she was walking to lunch, blaming it on an introverted first year, which gave her an idea. Umbridge would plant pieces of evidence to support her views on the death eaters. The ministry did want rid of the death eaters and she could think no better way.

The next trip to Hogsmeade would be a fun one.


	9. Hogsmeade

Hogsmeade looked very pretty in spring and Cho agreed with Harry on this one. They'd decided to spend a bit of time together even though Ginny was furious. Harry still liked Cho, if not less intensely, she didn't seem to mind him either. The cherry blossoms fell on the road they walked across, when they saw Umbridge, looking hilarious. She was walking furtively into Zonko's Joke Shop, as if nobody should notice her.

"Why would Umbridge go to a Joke Shop?" Cho thought out loud, in a dream like voice.

"She went to Zonkos?" Harry had a smile on his face, mischievously, "We should have a look too,"

"If it caught her interest, it must be different," Cho giggled as they walked in.

They hid behind a shelf as Umbridge pored over smoke screens, powders, enchantments, potions and such forth. She even checked out a havoc book at one point. "Do you think it's for a young family member?" Cho asked quietly.

"I wouldn't think so," Harry had a suspicion, that Umbridge was up to a few tricks herself.

They watched as she looked at the Dark Peruvian Screen Powder, and the Joke Sneak-a-Scopes.

She wandered around looking at the weirdest items in the shop. "You know, if she is gonna play a prank, it'll be the weirdest dark sick joke there ever was," Harry mumbled. Cho chuckled to herself, shaking her head, "That's the line Ministry Officials like to set!"

Umbridge searched around for more things, that most schoolchildren would be embarrassed to be found with.

"Hey Harry, do you wanna go to Honeydukes?" Cho asked, after a stretch of creeping around Umbridge.

"Um," Harry wasn't really listening, he was just being a bit weird and annoying, "Uh,"

"Well, if you don't want to come, I'll go pick up some chocolate and meet you here, ok?" Cho huffed.

She walked away, and Potter sat beside some love potions, in a neat little corner of the shop, staring at Umbridge. Why on earth was she looking at the weird stuff? He heard a booming voice from beside him, startling him. "Looking for a love potion are ya boy?" It was the great Mr Zonko himself, looking at Harry's very peculiar sight.

"Oh Mr Zonko, do you know what Umbridge was buying?" Harry asked.

Zonko chuckled greatly, heaving his chest, "Customer confidentiality! How else do Hogwarts Pranksters get away with things?"

"Umbridge is a Hogwarts prankster?" Harry said mockingly.

"You can never tell who is a Hogwarts prankster! Everyone seems to be these days." Zonko sounded serious.

Harry looked around for Cho, and seeing that she wasn't there, he decided to go to Honeydukes. "Hermione and Ron might want some sweets. And Cho,"

When he got to Honeydukes, though Cho was already there. "Cho! Fancy meeting you here, I wondered where you'd gone!"

Cho turned around. "Fancy meeting me!" She repeated, "Are you kidding Harry Potter?" She stormed off, to a bunch of her friends who huddled around her, protectively.

That went wrong, Harry thought, wondering which sweets he'd buy.


	10. Umbridge’s Evil Plan

Umbridge was talking to Fudge using the Floo Network in Hogwarts. She was sitting in front of the fire with an array of weird objects from Zonko's Joke Shop. "And this one," she held up a love potion, "I'll put next to Bellatrix's bag and frame her for conspiring to enamourate the headmaster!" She laughed like she was on wine. She was on wine, that was the point.

"Right," Fudge said uncertainly.

"Lucius Malfoy will get the Fanged Frisbee special edition kit. He obviously will be shown up as immature and not able to teach kids! Who owns a fanged frisbee nowadays except kids!?"

Fudge didn't want to add his very respectable wife owned one.

"My plan will work. Nobody will link it up to me at all! I bet nobody else thought of framing the blighters,"

"I read a report about how they're not bad teachers," Fudge lightly said.

"Ha HA!" A bang sounded as the door slammed open, revealing Harry Potter, the knight in shining armour, the guy with the cape. "I have come to confirm my suspicions," he eyed the joke materials.

Walking into Umbridge's room, he laughed as he saw the ridiculous items. "I will tell the teachers about this and then you'll learn."

Umbridge walked up to him, "my dear boy the teachers were learn nothing of this! You hear me?" She aimed her wand as Snape walked in.

"Finite Incantem," he spoke lazily. Or Snape-ily.

"I thought Potter was joking when he told me you were up to something. Now you've proved to be as ridiculous as him,"

Umbridge was kicked out of Hogwarts that night from inspection duties and kicked into the Daily Prophet the next day.


	11. The End, I’m Tired

Hogwarts lived happily ever after with its assistant professors who greatly helped the school's pupils. Umbridge not so. Fudge enjoyed playing frisbee with his wife after Umbridge was sued by Bellatrix for being a bitch.


End file.
